Twilight yet I can’t sleep.
My mind goes back…
I want to go back…
Can we go back?
To that moment three years ago…
To that space two years ago…
To that moment a year ago?
I go back but I can’t figure out where to stand.
On which side of this story do I sit?
Through which door do I want to walk?
Do I want to go back to the moment before it all changed…
Before it all disappeared…
Before it washed away with my tears?
Or do I want to go to the moment after we disconnected,
After I walked away,
Thinking this was going to finally be it?
That you were finally it?
That you were finally him?
But you can never be him
because you look for the same thing I do,
And I’m just not that open minded.
So instead I sit here typing
on my phone when I should be sleeping
Because even three years later
I can’t get my two eyes to agree
That you aren’t the one I dream of.
1/26/21 3:33 am