Self-Check: Is Stubbornness Preventing You from Being Proactive?

As we’ve discussed, there are many reasons people put things off. One of them is stubbornness. If you think you are better than others, have a hot head, or are above doing certain tasks, you will put things off in hopes someone else will realize that you should not be doing them. Now, while I know I don’t have any readers who think they are the Almighty Himself, who knows who from the internet may come across this or if you may have some friends who need this message.

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How to Get Used to Being Proactive

One of the reasons procrastinators put things off is that they have a low threshold for stress and discomfort. They aren’t used to doing things as they come in, so they push them off and lie to themselves that they will have more time later or will do it better when under pressure. Unfortunately, being uncomfortable is a part of life. This does NOT mean that you allow others to walk on you or that you accept being stressed as a lifestyle. It means that you put things into place so your discomfort comes from being outside your comfort zone mentally and your stress is self-induced not because of your surroundings.

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How Shifting Your Mindset Helps You Become More Proactive

If you want to procrastinate less, it means becoming more proactive. This can be hard for folks who have procrastinated for most of their lives. It feels like travelling down a road you’ve never known existed. Nothing feels the same when you go through life ensuring you are ahead of schedule instead of just on time. Today, let’s focus on how to you change your mindset to make this shift and then we will dive in this week to how to make this change.

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Poetry / Prose: What Do You Do?

This month is Domestic Violence Awareness Month and yesterday was Mental Health Awareness Day. In honor of them, I pulled out this poem from the deep, archives of my notebooks. I wrote it as a teenager and wanted to share it today because one of the things we often put off is talking with our children about the things to truly matter in today’s world. Admitting that we too have struggled at some time is really hard. But sharing the truth with our kids about what we felt helps them understand they aren’t alone in this world and we really do know how they are feeling. We were kids once too.

I was about 14 or 15 when I wrote this and was living in a girl’s home. It was truly a time of being alone while surrounded by many. It was a really dark time in my life, so I want to give you a trigger warning, especially if your currently dealing with mental health struggles such as suicidal thoughts and ideations. I don’t answer anything but I ask a lot of questions. In the end, I am glad I used writing as the main outlet for expressing my emotions and that I kept pressing forward and am here today to share this, 30 years later.

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How Saying “Yes” Can Encourage Procrastination

We’ve made it to Day 10 (1/3 of the way) of our challenge! Yesterday, we talked about excuses people make when they procrastinate and how it can lead them to feel justified in their actions. One that is really popular and warrants additional exploration is, “There isn’t enough time to do everything.” We talked in the post about having a packed schedule is one of the contributions to this excuse and how important it is to set appropriate boundaries. Let’s dive into this one a little deeper because it’s important for you to see how saying “Yes” to everything that comes your way can encourage you to procrastinate more.

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The Tongue and the Pen: A Thought for World Mental Health Day

If the tongue is a double-edge sword, the pen is a grenade with the pin already pulled.

~Shell Vera
A graphic with the quote "If the tongue is a double-edged sword, the pen is a grenade with a pin already pulled."
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Self-Check: Do You Use These Excuses to Justify Your Procrastination?

Day 9. Can you believe it? How is October already going this fast?! When I think about how fast time flies, I can see how it’s easy to procrastinate and want to get the most out of each day with things we love to do versus have to do. But we aren’t here for that, are we? We are here to kick this terrible habit out of our lives for good.

The problem with chronic procrastination is that we begin to make excuses believing they are reasons for our delays and inability to get things done. We avoid important tasks, push off large projects, and stall on completing everyday tasks because we become acclimated to putting things off and less comfortable with doing them. We start to build confidence that our procrastination habit is either the result the result of something we can’t fix or that it is under control.

Let’s look at a few of the excuses that pop up often for procrastinators who want to justify their behavior. Understanding these excuses will help you address the ones you use most and dig deeper toward uprooting your habit.

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Poetry: See Me

This was originally a blog post I wrote after an intense encounter with God in April 2016. Then my friend Voice challenged me to write it into spoken word format. I posted the video on IG yesterday from when I shared it the first time publicly at Voice’s birthday celebration in 2016. After listening to it again, I realize that it cut off the end, which wraps it up. Yes, it’s a LONG one. If you’re down for some healing and entering into my journey, join me. This is my testimony, or at least a part of it.

The full poem, shown below, is also published within When I Stopped Remembering Tomorrow. The book is a collection of poetry along with prose sharing my reflections on how falling in love with someone who didn’t love me caused me to meet the God I thought I knew all along, and that helped me to fall in love with the woman I am and the one I am becoming. Buy it today if you have a $7.99 (Kindle) or 11.99 (paperback) to spare.

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Self-Check: Do You Possess these Traits Common Among Procrastinators?

Welcome to Week 2 of our Procrastination to Progress Challenge. This week we are going to talk about traits, excuses, how not saying “No” can create procrastination, how to make the jump from Procrastination Champ to Progress Warrior, how to build up to living a proactive lifestyle, and a few changes you can make to become proactive this week! It’s going to be a full week. Let’s jump in.

There’s a false sense of security in procrastination that helps you feel good for the moment. Your decision to postpone tasks is typically associated with a lie or false belief that will cause you to take action. An example is delaying submitting resumes because you know you aren’t going to get any call backs since last time you tried you didn’t have positive results. The fear of rejection is what’s preventing you from submitting the resumes but it manifests itself as procrastination to attempt to block you from digging deep. Our ego loves to protect us!

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Poetry: The Thoughts Between the Pillows (After Colin Tan)

I believe this poem is what they are calling an “After”, where you read someone’s poem and write about the thoughts it triggers. I saw the poem earlier this year and began reflecting on it. The whole poem was great, but the last line left me feeling chills and the idea of a verse in the poem led to me thinking about “the space between the pillows”. As I’ve healed from my marriage and divorce, the decisions we both made, and the life we lived together, it’s taken a lot of reflection. Much of that reflection happens in the nighttime hours when the house is quiet. That is also a dangerous time of night because it’s when you suddenly realize how alone you are. The space between what was and what is, what could be and what will be, becomes so much clearer… and emptier. So I wrote about the thoughts that came to me, thinking back to when I was within those first years of divorce and just starting to see my reflection again and like it.

Be sure to read Colin’s poem below. By clicking on the IG post, you will be able to read the text in the caption. Then support him by purchasing his first book, “The Man Who Ate My Arms” before his next one is released!

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